Advantages of mediation over litigation for separated couples: navigating divorce smoothly

Going through a separation is undeniably challenging. When there are decisions to make about children, finances, and assets, finding the best solution can feel overwhelming. Increasingly, people who are divorcing are discovering the advantages of mediation over litigation for separated couples, offering a harmonious, cost-effective, and personalised approach. Mediation in the divorce landscape Mediation involves a neutral third party, the mediator, who facilitates communication between both parties to reach a shared agreement. This process is about collaboration, with the mediator ensuring discussions remain on track, without imposing decisions. Whether decisions concern weekend visits with children or property division, mediation is […]

What are the benefits of Child-Inclusive Mediation for Blended Families

If you’re reading this, you’re probably a parent in a blended family, striving to create a happy home environment. We understand that co-parenting can sometimes feel like climbing a mountain, especially in a blended family setup. You want to make sure everyone’s voice is heard, especially the children. This is where child-inclusive mediation steps in, and it might just be the solution you need. Child-inclusive mediation has benefits for blended families, not just separated families. So, what is child-inclusive mediation? It’s a process where children are given a chance to share their feelings and thoughts about family matters in a […]

How do I handle co-parenting when my ex and I have very different parenting styles?

How do I handle co-parenting when my ex and I have very different parenting styles? Riley* Dear Riley, Navigating co-parenting is certainly a challenging task especially when you and your ex have differing views on parenting styles. Your concern is valid, as inconsistency between two households can be confusing for children, and in some cases, harmful. However, we need to understand that different does not necessarily mean wrong. While you and your ex may have different approaches, it doesn’t mean that one is better than the other. The key lies in finding a middle ground that serves your child’s best […]

Our divorce has put me in a tough financial spot. How do I manage my children’s expectations for gifts, activities, and holidays?

Our divorce has put me in a tough financial spot. How do I manage my children’s expectations for gifts, activities, and holidays? Casey* Dear Casey, It can be hard restarting financially after a divorce.  It costs more to run two households than one and the cost of living crisis is making that harder.  You can also experience a lot of emotions around this that can affect various aspects of your life, including your relationship with your children.  It’s hard when you just can’t give them what you could once afford.  The key to approaching this issue is open communication with […]

When is the right time to introduce a new partner to my children post-divorce?

When is the right time to introduce a new partner to my children post-divorce? *Bailey Dear Bailey, The decision to introduce a new partner to your children following a divorce is an incredibly sensitive and important one. There is a lot of research on this topic that aims to help families navigate these complex situations. First: timing is crucial. Waiting until your relationship with the new partner is stable and committed is better than bringing someone into their lives before the relationship has stood the test of time. In the context of a post-divorce situation, children may already be coping […]

What’s the best way to explain our divorce to my children without blaming either parent?

What’s the best way to explain the divorce to my children without blaming either parent? Morgan* Dear Morgan, I empathise with your situation. Divorce can be a difficult time for the entire family, and finding the right words to explain it to your children is no small feat. The first thing to remember is that children are much more perceptive than we often give them credit for. While your instinct may be to shield them from the emotions, honesty (within reason) is important. However, being honest doesn’t mean burdening your children with adult problems or blaming either parent. Now, how […]

Working out our parenting schedule is overwhelming. Do you have any tips for simplifying the process?

Working out our parenting schedule is overwhelming. Do you have any tips for simplifying the process? Ben* Dear Ben Working out and managing a parenting time schedule can be a daunting task.  You have to balances emotions and logistics – for the adults and the children. The most important thing to remember is that both parents should keep the welfare of their child as the priority with any decisions. Open communication is crucial. It is absolutely essential that you and your ex-partner are on the same page when it comes to the parenting schedule. This can be easier said than […]

My ex and I can barely talk without arguing. How can we better communicate for the sake of our kids?

My ex and I can barely talk without arguing. How can we better communicate for the sake of our kids? Alex* Dear Alex, Your situation is both challenging and, unfortunately, not uncommon. Communication breakdowns can often happen after a relationship ends, but when children are involved, it is important to find a way to communicate more effectively for their wellbeing. First, remember that your job as a parent is to provide a stable, nurturing environment for your kids. Keeping this in mind is a constant reminder to put personal issues aside during interactions with your ex-partner. Sometimes knowing what you’re […]

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How do I cope with an over-exhausted child after time with the other parent?

My daughter comes home over-exhausted from her one night a week at her Dad’s. The next day she is so irritable because she is still so tired. What can I do? I really want to stop overnights. These have only started 3 weeks ago but I don’t think my 2.5 year old girl is coping Sarah* Dear Sarah, Your worries and feelings of distress are completely normal, especially when dealing with something as sensitive as the wellbeing of your young daughter. I understand that this is a difficult time for you, and as someone who has worked with separated families […]

Child drawing

Creating safe spaces for children in mediation: The Child Consultant’s approach in child inclusive mediation

As a Child Consultant and Social Worker deeply invested in the field of child-inclusive mediation, I’ve experienced firsthand the crucial role that creating a safe and comfortable environment plays in effectively engaging children in the mediation process. It is only when children feel secure, valued, and respected that they can freely express their thoughts and feelings. The very nature of mediation – discussing and resolving potentially contentious family issues – can be daunting for children. But research continually underscores the importance of children’s participation in matters that affect their lives (Cashmore & Parkinson, 2008; McIntosh, Wells, Smyth & Long, 2008). […]